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Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed.

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benj <benj@nobody.net> wrote:
> On 6/13/2018 2:42 PM, Odd Bodkin wrote:
>> benj <benj@nobody.net> wrote:
>>> On 6/13/2018 1:52 PM, Odd Bodkin wrote:
>>>> benj <benj@nobody.net> wrote:
>>>>> On 6/13/2018 9:25 AM, Odd Bodkin drooled:
>>>>>> "Welcome students! You have now entered the hallowed ground of graduate
>>>>>> studies in physics, and it's time we spent a little attention to how
>>>>>> you're going to spend your future careers. No need beating around the
>>>>>> bush. You are about to embark on a life of fraud."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Sir? Excuse me? No one told us about this."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Yes, I know, it's a deep secret only suspected by a few people and
>>>>>> we've managed to make them all appear crazy."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Sir? So the Large Hadron Collider, the LIGO observatory, the Apollo
>>>>>> landings? Those were all faked?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Absolutely. Not a stitch of truth to them. None of them work."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Sir, so you're saying we're going to spend the rest of our careers
>>>>>> making things that do not work?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Absolutely."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "But, sir.... why?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "To further the mystery, son, to further the mystery."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "But sir... why not just work on building things that do work?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Because, my poor naive lad, anyone can do that."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "So what you're saying sir, is that it's better for us to pretend to
>>>>>> build something that no one else can build, even though it doesn't work
>>>>>> at all, than to build something that anyone else could build too?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "That's what physics is for, son."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "But sir, I'm not sure I want to do that. I'd rather do something real
>>>>>> and constructive. I'd rather truly learn something about how nature works."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Don't be silly, my poor boy, all that was already discovered centuries
>>>>>> ago. There's nothing more to do in that arena."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Sir, with all due respect, what's in it for me? Will I get rich working
>>>>>> on a project at the Large Hadron Collider?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Rich? RICH? Don't be silly! You'll get a teaching salary at a
>>>>>> university, which as you know is not all that great, or perhaps you'll
>>>>>> get a federally funded lab researcher position which is a government pay
>>>>>> grade."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Well, if I'm not going to get rich, will I get famous?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Heck no! The big Fake Facilities, or FFs as we call them, have hundreds
>>>>>> or even thousands of physicists working on them, and so any notoriety
>>>>>> from fake results published will get distributed among all those people.
>>>>>> You'll be an anonymous cog on a large list of authors."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Sir, please, if I'm not doing anything real in physics, and if I'm not
>>>>>> going to get rich, and if I'm not going to get famous, can you tell me
>>>>>> at least if it will be easy work?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Son, you're young, I know you don't understand this. No, it will be a
>>>>>> life of constant toil, working long hours at low pay pretending to build
>>>>>> things that don't actually work, and then in your off time, you'll be
>>>>>> spending hours and hours perpetuating the conspiracy, deflecting the
>>>>>> comments of those who smell fraud. Do you know how hard it is to keep
>>>>>> the Apollo myth going? Conspiracy to perpetuate fraud is hard work!
>>>>>> Never-ending!"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "So Professor, sir, you're saying that the life of a physicist is long,
>>>>>> hard work, producing nothing but lies and false claims, for low pay and
>>>>>> no fame, just for the sake of being able to say we're physicists, which
>>>>>> we now know is just another word for fraudulent liars?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "That's exactly right."
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> "Great, we're in. What's next?"
>>>>>> 
>>>>>> 
>>>>> Come on Boinker, We've all heard that speech (well those of us who
>>>>> actually got into graduate school) And I notice that you neglected to
>>>>> mention the SECOND HALF of the speech where it is explained how all the
>>>>> Big FF are just for public show and to impress the public enough so
>>>>> money can be siphoned off into secret "black" projects where all the
>>>>> REAL advanced science is done and where the "best and brightest" in the
>>>>> class will likely end up. After all there is so much secret science that
>>>>> it can't all be supported by just the government run illegal drug
>>>>> business! You didn't mention that, did you?
>>>>> 
>>>> 
>>>> I could have counted on you to magnify the conspiracy.
>>>> 
>>> Tell the truth, Boinker. You've never really been in graduate school and
>>> never actually heard the lecture, right? Ask Sergio. He's been in
>>> graduate school and of course heard the speech.
>>> 
>> 
>> But is it plausibly true, my account?
>> 
> Of course Boinker. Only those of us who have been through graduate 
> school know that you hear that lecture at the END of your studies not 
> when you enter graduate school! They don't just hand out the secret 
> handshake to all neophytes! :-)
> 
> 
> 

The interesting test on this newsgroup is how many people believe it. 

-- 
Odd Bodkin — Maker of fine toys, tools, tables

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Thread

The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. Odd Bodkin <bodkinodd@gmail.com> - 2018-06-13 08:25 -0500
  Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. benj <benj@nobody.net> - 2018-06-13 11:29 -0400
    Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. Odd Bodkin <bodkinodd@gmail.com> - 2018-06-13 17:52 +0000
      Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. benj <benj@nobody.net> - 2018-06-13 14:34 -0400
        Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. Odd Bodkin <bodkinodd@gmail.com> - 2018-06-13 18:42 +0000
          Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. benj <benj@nobody.net> - 2018-06-13 14:56 -0400
            Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. Odd Bodkin <bodkinodd@gmail.com> - 2018-06-13 19:22 +0000
              Ben, like most of us, thinks with his dick. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2018-06-15 01:16 -0700
                Re: Ben, like most of us, thinks with his dick. benj <benj@nobody.net> - 2018-06-15 11:22 -0400
                Repressed Christians fuck the most, and science isn't their friend. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2018-06-15 14:40 -0700
              Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. poraty149@gmail.com - 2018-06-15 05:08 -0700
                Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. James McGinn <jimmcginn9@gmail.com> - 2018-06-15 10:05 -0700
  Re: The Grand Fraud of Physics, Revealed. James McGinn <jimmcginn9@gmail.com> - 2018-06-15 10:00 -0700

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