Groups > comp.os.linux.advocacy > #486955

Getting laid, like Mr. Owl.

From	Jeff-Relf.Me @.
Message-ID	<Jeff-Relf.Me@Feb.7--10.55am.Seattle.2019> (permalink)
References	(1 earlier) <xz0b803ga.4@rooftop.invalid> <9%J6E.635307$QQ5.390103@fx45.iad> <Jeff-Relf.Me@Feb.6--4.18pm.Seattle.2019> <s8z0b8083t.a3u3j@rooftop.invalid> <8a31293f-e254-49d1-aa2a-9b34cca9e776@googlegroups.com>
Newsgroups	comp.os.linux.advocacy, sci.physics, alt.checkmate
Subject	Getting laid, like Mr. Owl.
Organization	blocknews - www.blocknews.net
Date	2019-02-07 10:55 -0800

Cross-posted to 3 groups.

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Steve Carroll replied:
> > > I've been 240 pounds for many years now ( 6ft, 60 years old ).
> 
> 215 pounds (6ft.)  I look like a rail at 183.

To get laid, like Mr. Owl, I'd have to fix my teeth, dress nicer/cleaner, 
lose 90 lbs, do push-ups, and find a more prestigious, higher paying job.

Even then, I'd have to pay for it, and let her fuck 20 year-olds too.

She'd boss me around, and the sex would be horrible compared to:

  Tenga's "Flip Zero" latches on and won't let go, 
  so you can edge for 5+ HOURS,
  even when you're distracted by something else.

  And it feels good after nutting too -- so even a 60 year-old man, like me,
  nuts multiple times.  Vaseline is the best lube.  It never leaks; no mess.
  When done, open it up, wipe it down with a paper towel, and lay it on its side.

  Once dry, put it back in its case, so it stays clean.
  If this product doesn't take over the world, the world is wrong.

Thread

Blast from the past (Feb 1999): Windows Refund Day - When GuhNoo/Linux Users Demanded Their Money Back DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-06 15:01 -0500
  GuhNoo/Linux Users Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-06 12:15 -0800
    Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-06 15:19 -0500
      Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-06 20:43 +0000
        Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-06 15:19 -0800
        Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-06 18:22 -0500
          Natasha Lyonne's "Russian Doll". Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-06 16:18 -0800
            Re: Natasha Lyonne's "Russian Doll". owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-07 16:37 +0000
              Re: Natasha Lyonne's "Russian Doll". Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-07 10:20 -0800
                Getting laid, like Mr. Owl. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-07 10:55 -0800
                Re: Getting laid, like Mr. Owl. "Sir Gregory Hall,  Esq." <greghall@yacht_maester.fake> - 2019-02-07 14:14 -0500
                My prostate is positively glowing, these days. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-07 11:22 -0800
                Re: Getting laid, like Mr. Owl. % <persent@gmail.com> - 2019-02-07 12:22 -0700
                Re: Getting laid, like Mr. Owl. Checkmate <ricksabian1@gmail.com> - 2019-02-07 11:13 -0800
                Re: Natasha Lyonne's "Russian Doll". owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-07 21:40 +0000
                Two 7 gallon VittlesVaults. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-07 14:20 -0800
                Re: Two 7 gallon VittlesVaults. DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-07 18:40 -0500
                Get rid of your "ball and chain". Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-07 21:57 -0800
                Re: Get rid of your "ball and chain". Ratchetjaw <ratchetjaw@mail.com> - 2019-02-08 14:10 +0000
                Re: Get rid of your "ball and chain". chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-08 08:18 -0600
                Re: Get rid of your "ball and chain". "Sir Gregory Hall,  Esq." <greghall@yacht_maester.fake> - 2019-02-08 10:22 -0500
                Re: Get rid of your "ball and chain". "Pedophile Neal Warren" <208.Sienna.Pl@Saluda.NC> - 2019-02-08 09:26 -0600
            Re: Natasha Lyonne's "Russian Doll". DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-11 14:50 -0500
              I don't have a ball and chain. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-11 13:52 -0800
                Re: I don't have a ball and chain. Ratchetjaw <ratchetjaw@mail.com> - 2019-02-11 22:01 +0000
                Re: I don't have a ball and chain. Bucket Mouth - 2019-02-11 15:04 -0700
                Re: I don't have a ball and chain. % <persent@gmail.com> - 2019-02-11 15:02 -0700
        Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Chris Ahlstrom <OFeem1987@teleworm.us> - 2019-02-09 19:07 -0500
          Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-09 21:28 -0500
            Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-11 04:21 +0000
              Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-11 07:25 -0600
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Snit <usenet@gallopinginsanity.com> - 2019-02-11 13:58 +0000
              Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-11 13:50 -0500
                Owl going to send us a DickPic with a COLA tattoo. Jeff-Relf.Me  @. - 2019-02-11 14:10 -0800
                Re: Owl going to send us a DickPic with a COLA tattoo. owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-11 22:13 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-11 22:15 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-11 18:14 -0500
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-12 01:51 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-11 21:09 -0500
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-12 02:17 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-11 22:12 -0500
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-12 04:51 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-12 06:49 -0600
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-12 22:07 -0500
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-13 07:02 -0800
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-13 10:21 -0500
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-13 07:48 -0800
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-13 10:08 -0600
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-13 17:12 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-13 09:27 -0800
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-13 17:58 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users Steve Carroll <fretwizzer@gmail.com> - 2019-02-13 10:34 -0800
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-13 12:51 -0600
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-13 19:20 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users chrisv <chrisv@nospam.invalid> - 2019-02-14 07:41 -0600
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-14 16:07 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-14 04:53 +0000
                Re: GuhNoo/Linux Users DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-14 23:27 -0500
  Re: Blast from the past (Feb 1999): Windows Refund Day - When GuhNoo/Linux Users Demanded Their Money Back owl <owl@rooftop.invalid> - 2019-02-06 20:54 +0000
    Re: Blast from the past (Feb 1999): Windows Refund Day - When GuhNoo/Linux Users Demanded Their Money Back DFS <nospam@dfs.com> - 2019-02-06 18:20 -0500
  Re: Blast from the past (Feb 1999): Windows Refund Day - When GuhNoo/Linux Users Demanded Their Money Back silverslimer <silver@slim.er> - 2019-02-06 16:52 -0500

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