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Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop

From Deeyana <d.awlberg@hotmail.invalid>
Newsgroups comp.lang.java.programmer, rec.arts.movies.current-films, rec.arts.tv
Subject Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop
Followup-To comp.os.os2.advocacy
Date 2011-04-26 19:48 +0000
Organization A noiseless patient Spider
Message-ID <ip77j6$ghj$1@dont-email.me> (permalink)
References <6dfc643b-d46f-4ffe-9081-b69b5463412d@p23g2000vbl.googlegroups.com>

Cross-posted to 3 groups.

Followups directed to: comp.os.os2.advocacy

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On Sun, 24 Apr 2011 13:25:56 -0700, Zonker Bill wrote:

> Please forgive us if our short term memory is a little lacking, but we
> could swear we looked at the calendar this morning and noticed that
> today is 4/20. Also, we could swear we looked at the calendar this
> morning and noticed that today is 4/20.

Classic illogic. The headers on your post indicate it was sent on 4/24, 
Zonker Bill.

> Weed smokers of the world rejoice, it’s a celebration!

What does your celebration have to do with Java, current films, or 
television, Zonker Bill?

> As you bask in the glow of copious amounts of weed consumption today,
> as always, make sure to do so responsibly.

What does your drug habit have to do with Java, current films, or 
television, Zonker Bill?

> We don’t mean “responsibly” in the “drink too much booze and you’ll
> wind up in a coma” sense. That’s not really a problem with the weed.

What does your classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim have to do 
with Java, current films, or television, Zonker Bill?

> Smoke too much and the worst that will happen is you’ll devour an
> entire large pizza and fall asleep for the night by 8pm.

What does your classic unsubstantiated and erroneous claim have to do 
with Java, current films, or television, Zonker Bill?

> What we’re referring to, of course, are police.
> 
> Nothing kills a good buzz like an undercover cop with too much time on
> their hands striking up a conversation with you out of the blue about
> what you’re smoking. So keep your glassy eyes peeled, and use these
> handy tips for spotting an undercover cop while you celebrate 4/20
> today.
> 
> Check Out the Car
> 
> In a perfect world, all police would be required to drive around in 1992
> Crown Victorias with gigantic antennas and a visible gun rack in the
> back seat. Unfortunately, it’s not that easy. These days, undercover
> cops are tooling around in anything from minivans to Mustangs. So how do
> you spot a car that’s outfitted for the sole purpose of harshing your
> mellow?
> 
> Fortunately, police need lots of special equipment in their cruisers to
> do their jobs effectively. If you look hard enough, you can see it. AOL,
> of all places, has a great guide to spotting undercover cop cars on
> their auto blog. Here are some highlights:
> 
> On unmarked cars, lights are often placed in the grill, front windshield
> and exterior mirrors. Even if they aren’t turned on, you should be able
> to see them provided there is a sufficient amount of light.
> 
> Look for stubby police antennas on the trunk lid and more lights in the
> rear windshield.
> 
> Each state has special license plates that are issued to government
> workers. Learn yours. If you see it on the car that’s pulling up to the
> spot where you’re lighting up, swallow that weed like a professional.
> [PHOTO]
> 
> Pay Attention to Details
> 
> Here’s the thing about undercover cops…they’re really good at blending
> in with the environment they’re in. Anyone who’s ever been enjoying a
> joint on a park bench only to have a guy in flip-flops and a Hawaiian
> shirt flashing a badge in their face out of the blue will surely attest
> to that.
> 
> But everybody makes mistakes, police are no different. Does that shady
> weed dealer at your local park with the three day facial hair growth,
> unkempt hair and filthy clothes also have impeccably manicured
> fingernails? Is he wearing a beat to shit army jacket and four hundred
> dollar Armani jeans? If so, you probably shouldn’t buy your weed from
> him.
> 
> Actually, you shouldn’t just walk up to anyone you don’t know and try to
> buy drugs from them. But if it’s come to that, at least watch for those
> little inconsistencies that might indicate that they aren’t who they say
> they are.
> 
> Don’t Bother Asking
> 
> There’s a popular myth that claims if you ask an undercover cop if
> they’re a cop, they have to tell you if they are. Not true, says Barry
> Cooper, a former undercover cop who came around to the good side and now
> gets paid to tell people how to spot and avoid being busted by
> undercover cops.
> 
> In fact, he says this misconception actually helps law enforcement:
> 
> Many times as an undercover, suspects would ask if I were a cop and
> explain I must tell if I were. I would respond, “No. I’m not a cop and
> you are correct. I would have to tell you if I were.” The suspects were
> always comfortable with this answer and would sometimes comment on how
> cool the “must tell” law was.
> 
> So that’s a bummer. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t mention the
> police at all if you think an undercover is in your midst…
> 
> Did You Hear the News?
> 
> Did the police make a significant bust in your area recently? If so,
> mention it. Undercover cops are trained to stay relaxed in high pressure
> situations, but by bringing up some especially noteworthy piece of
> police news, you’ve just entered something into the mix that normally
> isn’t present…their ego. Try mentioning that you don’t see what the big
> deal is about the bust that was all over the news last week and then,
> just like in poker, wait for the tell.
> 
> Nobody likes to have their pride injured, and that’s exactly what you’re
> doing. If the guy hoping to sell you a pound of kush suddenly snaps at
> you about how that bust was a HUGE deal, you’re probably dealing with a
> cop. Watch for any reaction that strikes you as out of the ordinary. If
> your gut is telling you to flee the scene, do it.
> 
> Hits From the Bong
> 
> This tidbit is especially for the dealers out there, and once again, it
> comes from former undercover agent Barry Cooper. If you suspect that the
> person you’re selling to is a cop, offer them a bong hit. Not a joint,
> not a blunt, not a hitter…a bong hit.
> 
> Why? Because undercover cops are strictly prohibited from actually
> partaking in drugs while in the field. Some are even tested immediately
> after returning from their crime fighting missions. That said, they are
> trained to hit a joint or some other lightweight toking apparatus
> without taking any smoke into their lungs. They just pass it through
> their nose and back out into the air. What a waste!
> 
> But anyone who knows anything knows that hitting a bong without using
> your lungs is literally impossible. No respectable drug purchaser is
> going to pass on the opportunity to sample what you’re selling prior to
> paying for it, be it in a joint, a bong or a hollowed out apple. If you
> offer up your intricately handcrafted, dragon shaped bong and they
> refuse, something is amiss. Tell them to kick rocks and live to sell the
> good stuff another day.

What does any of that have to do with Java, current films, or television, 
Zonker Bill?

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Thread

Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Zonker Bill <joe.snod@yahoo.com> - 2011-04-24 13:25 -0700
  Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Captain Infinity <Infinity@captaininfinity.us> - 2011-04-24 16:43 -0400
    Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop thinbluemime <thinbluemime@geemail.com> - 2011-04-24 17:18 -0400
    Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Joe Snodgrass <joe.snod@yahoo.com> - 2011-04-27 09:42 -0700
      Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Captain Infinity <Infinity@captaininfinity.us> - 2011-04-27 20:22 -0400
        Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Joe Snodgrass <joe.snod@yahoo.com> - 2011-04-28 07:37 -0700
  Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop weberm@polaris.net (Ubiquitous) - 2011-04-24 13:25 -0700
  Re: Five Tips for Spotting an Undercover Cop Deeyana <d.awlberg@hotmail.invalid> - 2011-04-26 19:48 +0000

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